Now we come to the ancient and dark art of re-attaching that most quintessential hallmark of civilisation, the button. Although buttons have been a formidable tool in humanity’s arsenal of fastening devices since 2000 BC, we manly-men have, until recently, been loath to attempt solo button-reconfiguration. Of course, in the past, males have claimed the task a lowly station unbefitting of the majesty of masculinity. The harsh truth is that button-sewing is a tricky bastard and many blokes have come ‘unstuck’ in their efforts. Lads! It is time to shed the shackles of traditional gender roles. It is time to embrace our inner metro-sexuality. It is time to liberate our beloved nannas from the bonds of needle and thread. Let us sew! (Disclaimer: I had to ask my nan how to do this)
What You Need:
1. A standard, sharp needle with a sturdy eye and modest girth
2. A generous length (45cm) of appropriately coloured thread – try and match the colours as closely as possible
3. A 4-hole flat button
Four Easy Steps
1. What’s a needle without thread? Thread that thread through the needle! Then double it up by pulling the thread down so the two ends meet.
2. Time to tackle the button-deficient garment. Sew a stitch where you want the button to be. A stitch? Why that is the fundamental building block of sewing! Push the needle through the fabric and back out again. Voila! Now sew a second stitch to secure the thread.
3. Now for the all-important button application routine. When the thread is secure, push the needle to the front of the garment and insert it through one of the holes of the button. Now send that bad-boy through the opposite hole and back into fabric. Continue doing this for about eight to ten times. That button ain’t goin nowhere!
4. Finally, on the inside of garment, secure the connection by performing 2 to 3 back stitches and cut off any extraneous thread.
Congratulations! You have now successfully repaired a faulty item of clothing. With the mastery of this important skill, the world is your oyster. Always remember: a fulfilled and successful lifestyle is a fully buttoned lifestyle. Go forth and sew!
Words by Jonathan Winter, illustrations by Josh Kim.